Wavering Faith or Firm Faith

How can I go from being so strong this weekend believing that there is nothing that God can't do to defeated, worried, fearful Liz. I so appreciate Amy sending me the song "Your my little Girl" this morning. I cried like a baby through the whole thing. The song is from the perspective of God singing to his little girl that he created so uniquely and cherishes so much. The song goes on to say that he feels the pain that his little girl is going through and it hurts him and it not fair but that he will never leave his little girl. He will be there whenever she calls even in the middle of the night. Unconditional love is empowering. So unhumanly, so unworldly. We put conditions. We get offended. So what has really changed in 4 days from Saturday until Tuesday? God says he is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. He doesn't change like the shifting shadows. He is not a man that he changes his mind. So really what has changed? Me. I lost my focus. In yesterday's post I said that I shouldn't listen to every word that comes out of people's mouth. But give me a night stew about it and the devil has a field day in my mind. Yesterday, I got a phone call from someone who was giving me information about what Dave is doing. It seems like at first when I hear bad news I respond in faith but then I think about it again and again. Like my dear sweet friend Anne says.... "the bird can fly over your head but you don't have to let them make a nest". So I should have dismissed those rumors or negative reports and not let them rob me of my faith. Also, like Sylvia said today, the person who said those hurtful words is not walking in the Spirit.

Whose word am I going to believe? God's Word or random rumors.

This reminds me of the 12 spies that were sent into spy out the promiseland.

Numbers 13:27-31

²⁷ They gave Moses this account: "We went into the land to which you sent us, and it does flow with milk and honey! Here is its fruit. ²⁸ But the people who live there are powerful, and the cities are fortified and very large. ...

³⁰ Then Caleb silenced the people before Moses and said, "We should go up and take possession of the land, for we can certainly do it."

³¹ But the men who had gone up with him said, "We can't attack those people; they are stronger than we are." ³² And they spread among the Israelites a bad report about the land they had explored. They said, "The land we explored devours those living in it. All the people we saw there are of great size. ³³ We saw the Nephilim there (the descendants of Anak come from the Nephilim). We seemed like grasshoppers in our own eyes, and we looked the same to them."

Lord please let me be like Caleb and Joshua! Lord, please send me a Caleb and a Joshua to stand with me and believe God and take his Word as true and stand with me for my marriage.

I should be so grateful that Dave decided to have a family lunch this past Sunday after church. I should be so grateful that he came to see Ashley's recital. And I am. I praise God and see that as an answer to the prayer request that I sent out. I see that as answer to Anne's prayer that she asked me to pray all week and asked her prayer group to pray. That is the first time we have been all together as a family since the whole horrible incident happened in August.

I need to be patient and wait on God to do what he does. He gives me strength as I wait on Him and abide in Him and that's GOOD NEWS!

Don't pay attention to every word people say.

²¹ Do not pay attention to every word people say,
or you may hear your servant cursing you-

²² for you know in your heart
that many times you yourself have cursed others.

(Ecclesiastes 7:22-22)

I think this is really good advice. I haven't read this in the bible before. I have always been the type to be hurt easily by what people say. This verse is so helpful to realize that people may vent, and sometimes even gossip, but you can't really judge what's in their heart. Its unwise to make decisions or dwell on their words because mostly likely they don't mean it anyway. Or if they do, they will work it out with themselves. Most likely their words were spoken in anger without thinking. I think a consistently mean-spirited person doesn't qualify here. The verse does say "do not pay attention to EVERY word..." . So if I make someone mad and they respond by saying something hurtful...I should let it go, as long as he or she doesn't make it a habit. This is helpful right now as I am separated and going through a really rough time in my marriage (which is hanging on by a prayer). I don't know what the future holds. I continue to pray and stand firm for God to do what he does best ....perform a miracle. He is the God of reconciliation, restoration, healing, life, and peace. I know that He is able to do more than what we ask or imagine. But I can't hang on every word that comes out of my husband's mouth, or what I hear that his family is saying. People make mistakes, get mad and say things they don't mean.... just like I do. The difference is that I know that I don't mean it. But since I can't read the other person's mind I may think they have worse intentions than they really do. And in the end, its really between the other person and God. As long as my conscience is clear and I am doing what's right in God's eyes and trusting Him for my needs then I can have the proverbial "thick skin" without a hard heart. And that's GOOD NEWS!!!!